San Diego Wedding Tips, courtesy of www.SanDiegoWedding.org

Sentimental Wedding Tips

2006-09-09T22:31:00.000-07:00

Spend a day making a time capsule. Each of you can write a letter containing your thoughts, dreams and hopes for your new life together. Put the two letters in a box and seal it. You can then open the box on a set date, maybe your 25th wedding anniversary.

Make a special wedding gift for your partner. For example, you could laminate a box with photographs or keepsakes, such as ticket stubs, from your courtship together.

On your wedding day, dab your, and your partner’s, handkerchiefs with your favorite fragrances, for a reminder of each other.

Write your own vows. Couples often find that their own words can be more meaningful than traditional vows and can give their ceremony a feeling of intimacy.

Arrange for a family member or close friend to make a video consisting of photos of you and the groom since you first met. Show the video to your guests while you are having your photos taken.

Have two special champagne flutes personalized for your reception. You can then use them on special occasions at home.

While you are on your honeymoon, write a postcard to your partner and mail it for a special surprise when he gets home.

Sentimental Ways to Honor Your Parents at Your Wedding

2006-09-05T22:16:00.000-07:00

1. Walk down the aisle (the recessional) to the same song as your mother did.

2. Give a rose to your mother and groom’s mother as you walk down the aisle.

3. Prior to the ceremony, place a personalized handkerchief and a rose at both mothers' seats. The handkerchief will be a wonderful keepsake and remembrance.

4. Have your mother’s bridal bouquet duplicated. Find some pictures of her wedding and give them to your florist.

5. Instead of doing a "bouquet toss", dedicate your bouquet to your mother.

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Invitation wording for divorced parents

2006-08-25T23:21:00.000-07:00

Your mother’s name goes first, followed by your father’s name. Do not connect the names with an "AND".

If your father hasn’t been in your life since you were a baby, it is acceptable to put just your mother’s name or the names of your mother and stepfather on the invitations.

Every family is unique, and there may be a host of other issues you are worrying about. Just remember that communication is a key. Keep both of your parents informed as to what you are thinking about and ask for input from both of them. Don’t compare one parent to another as this will only increase the tension for your big day.

If you are in a very complicated situation, you might want to consider asking your Officiant, wedding coordinator or counselor for advice.

Wedding Budgeting when Parents are Divorced

2006-08-17T22:03:00.000-07:00

How do you sort out wedding budgets when parents are divorced? Below are a few ideas that will ease tension and are socially acceptable.

Creating a Budget - Consider opening up a checking account for the sole purpose of wedding expenses. If both of your divorced parents are contributing to the wedding, discuss with them (together or separately, depending on the situation) and find out how much they can contribute. Ask both parents to write you a check for a lump sum and put it in your account. Take out the money as needed. That way you do not have to run after the money every time you make a wedding decision.

Another option is to write out a detailed list of all the expenses you plan to encounter. Go down the list, and assign each expense to a parent. Make a copy for each parent so they know what exactly you are expecting them to pay for.

Seating - If your parents aren’t on speaking terms, or if one of them has a girlfriend or spouse that your other parent is uncomfortable around, be sensitive and seat them apart.

Etiquette holds that in the ceremony, your mother and stepfather sit in the first row and your father and stepmother are seated in the second row.

If everyone gets along -- they can be seated together at the ceremony.

For the reception, it's usually best to seat them at different tables.

Getting married for the second time?

2006-08-17T11:45:00.000-07:00

Getting married for the second time? Or maybe you're marrying someone who has already been married before? Here are a few tips...

Don't Ask - Don’t ask about the details of his first wedding… and if you were married before - don’t bring up what you did at your first wedding. Just concentrate on planning the wedding the way you want it to be.

What to Wear? - No matter whether it is your first, second or third wedding… the focal point is still the wedding dress. Many second-time brides choose a simpler, more elegant or sophisticated wedding dress. Many second time brides will choose a floor length or cocktail length dress in white, off-white or a pretty pastel. Many choose a dress that they may wear again, such as a cocktail length dress or a dressy, feminine looking suit.

When it comes to bridesmaids, many second time brides choose to have a smaller wedding party with again, simpler style of bridesmaids dresses.

Children in Weddings - If you or your fiancé have children from previous marriages, include them as much as possible in your wedding plans!

Should I Register for Gifts? - YES! You may feel uncomfortable that friends and family gave you gifts at your previous wedding. There is no getting around that! People will want to give you a gift for your wedding. By registering, you help yourself by getting gifts that you want and you also help your guests in choosing gifts for you too.

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10 Reasons to Consider a Wedding Website

2006-08-16T12:41:00.000-07:00

1. You’re either planning a wedding at the last minute or years in advance.
2. The wedding invitations, reply cards and envelopes, and reception cards barely fit into their envelopes.
3. Some f your family and friends are clueless.
4. Half of the people in your wedding don’t know each other.
5. Information on paper has a way of disappearing.
6. You and your fiancé come from different cultural backgrounds.
7. Most of your family members live out-of-state, cross-country, or internationally.
8. Everyone wants to join you on your honeymoon.
9. Because it’s fun!
10. A way to get Bride and Groom involved in a fun project.

For more details

Advice for the Bride and Groom

2006-08-13T20:26:00.000-07:00

Tips for selecting a wedding gown
Tips on bridal gown styles
Groom’s Formal Wear
Obtaining your Marriage License
Marriage Laws
After the Wedding, Name and Address Changes
New name comes with the ring
The Art of Wedding Hair
Hair Tips: Long, Medium, and Short Hair
Tips for Getting Your Hair Done at the Salon
Getting Along
Getting Rid of Pre-Ceremony Stress
The Night Before Your Wedding
Honeymoon Tips
Storing your wedding gown
Caring for your diamond ring

Tips on bridal gown styles

2006-08-13T00:01:00.000-07:00

Different gown styles can help create a shorter, taller, heavier, or thinner look. Here are some tips:

A short, heavy figure: To look taller and slimmer, avoid knit fabrics. Use the princess or A-line style. Chiffon is the best fabric choice because it produces a floating effect and camouflages weight.

A short, thin figure: A shirtwaist or natural waist style with bouffant skirt will produce a taller, more rounded figure. Chiffon, velvet, lace and Schiffli net are probably the best fabric choices.

A tall, heavy figure: Princess or A-line are the best styles for slimming the figure; satin, chiffon and lace fabrics are recommended.

A tall, thin figure: Tiers or flounces will help reduce the impression of height. A shirtwaist or natural waist style with a full skirt are ideal choices. Satin and lace are the best fabrics.

Tips for selecting a wedding gown

2006-08-11T22:36:00.000-07:00

Here's some guidelines to help you select the most appropriate gown for your wedding:

Informal wedding:
Street-length gown or suitCorsage or small bouquetNo veil or train

Semi-formal wedding:
Floor-length gown; Chapel train; Finger-tip veil; Small bouquet

Formal daytime wedding:
Floor-length gown;Chapel or sweep train; Fingertip veil or hat; Gloves; Medium-sized bouquet

Formal evening wedding:
Same as formal daytime except longer veil

Very formal wedding:
Floor-length gown; Cathedral train; Full-length veil; Elaborate headpiece; Long sleeves or long arm-covering gloves; Cascading bouquet

Groom’s Formal Wear

2006-08-10T22:31:00.000-07:00

The groom should select his formal wear based on the formality of the wedding. For a semi-formal or formal wedding, the groom will need a tuxedo.

In selecting your formal wear, keep in mind the formality of your wedding, the time of day, and the bride's gown. Consider darker colors for a fall or winter wedding and lighter colors for a spring or summer wedding.

Reserve tuxedos for yourself and your ushers several weeks before the wedding to insure a wide selection and to allow enough time for alterations. Plan to pick up the tuxedos a few days before the wedding to allow time for last minute alterations in case they don't fit properly.

Tips To Save Money: Try to negotiate getting your tuxedo for free or at a discount in exchange for having your father, your fiancé's father and ushers rent their tuxedos at that shop.

Marriage Laws

2006-08-10T17:17:00.000-07:00

In order to get married, you need to apply and receive a marriage license. The rules for acquiring your marriage license varies from state to state, so you should check with your city's marriage bureau at your clerk of court's office to find out what your local rules are.

You'll typically need to apply for your marriage license at least one month before your wedding ceremony. You'll traditionally need to send in your birth certificates, tax information, and other official documents.

You don't, however, want to apply for your marriage license too early. In some states, the licenses do expire, if you don't get married within a few months.

When you apply for your license, you'll not only need a proof of identification and age, will need to provide any information about previous marriages, and will need to pay a nominal fee. Brides, you'll have to write your-married-name-to-be on the application.

You will also need to have a witness when you sign the application, so plan on bringing your maid of honor or best man with you.

On your wedding day, you'll give your chaplain your marriage license, then after the ceremony, he'll sign it and send it to the proper government agency for validation.

Obtaining your Marriage License

2006-08-09T07:10:00.000-07:00

Among the mnay details you have to do, don’t forget about the piece of paper that makes everything official: The Marriage License.

Plan ahead. Unless it’s Las Vegas, where spur-of-the-moment weddings are commonplace, figure on a waiting time before the license is issued. A safe estimation is 3-5 business days, with the certificate good for at least 30 days.

Medical Records. Some municipalities require blood tests or other medical records.

Bring ID. Commonly accepted forms of ID are birth certificates, drivers’ licenses and passports.

Carry Cash. Expect to pay a cost for the license. While it usually isn’t a sizeable fee, be prepared -- some places will only accept cash in the exact amount.

Go Together. Many places expect both bride and groom to be there, so plan to go on a day where both of you can be present.

This is only meant to be a guideline, so cCheck with your municipality to see what all the requirements are in your area for sure.

Not sure which municipality to contact? Generally speaking, if the bride’s resident state and the state of the wedding are the same, then an application is usually made at her municipality. If only the groom lives in that state, then it would be his municipality; if neither one of you lives there, the application is filled out in the municipality of the ceremony location.

After the Wedding, Name and Address Changes

2006-08-07T23:10:00.000-07:00

Whether you're following tradition and taking your husband's name, hyphenating, or making any other change you want legally recognized, here are the steps you'll need to follow.

Once you receive your official marriage certificate, the first step of recording your name change is with the Social Security Administration. Obtaining a Social Security card showing your new name (your number won't change) is free and fairly easy.

Next comes the pleasure of a visit to the Department of Motor Vehicles to update your driver's license. You will need to appear in person for this change. Bring your marriage certificate and new Social Security card, as well as your new proof of address if you've moved as well. Don't forget your old driver's license, which you'll have to surrender in exchange for an interim card until the new one arrives by mail.

And don't forget to change your name with:
Your employer
Your bank
Your mortgage company
Your passport

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New name comes with the ring

2006-08-06T22:32:00.000-07:00

When most women take their vows, they also take their new husband's family name. It's a time-honored tradition that still suits many brides, but it is also a choice that means you should consider all the legal requirements of a name change well before the wedding day.

When you receive your marriage license, contact your local Social Security office and Department of Motor Vehicles to obtain new identification cards. Be sure to ask your county clerk about the specific laws governing your area.There are plenty of institutions and government agencies that will need the updated name information. They include:

Employers, 401(k) or retirement accounts.
Banks, stockbrokers, credit card companies.
Post office, utility companies.
Voter registration, U.S. State Department (Passport Services).
Mortgage/deed/lease companies, insurance companies.
Personal memberships such as health or athletic clubs, schools and alumnae associations.

The Art of Wedding Hair

2006-08-05T22:55:00.000-07:00

Hair! What subject has produced more fears, tears and rituals, bottles, brushes, and headlines than that of the almighty coiffeur? Add the wedding day to this dilemma and there is coiffeur confusion, mad rushes to the magazine rack and tears begging our trusted stylist for help. Here are some great tips:

Dress: Maurer says to start with the dress because, "the brides total bridal look has to be taken into consideration, every thing must balance. The brides dress choice sets the tone for the entire ceremony and the hair design has to evoke the same feeling."

Texture: "Believe it or not the wedding gown can also dictate the texture of the finished hair design. A smooth, shiny Updo of curls or glossy stick straight hair complements a smooth satin gown. Where a gown of sweeping tulle is beautifully accented by soft flowing curls."

The silhouette: "Your look from head to toe has a silhouette, either horizontal or vertical. A full skirt is horizontal and best balanced by a wider hair design and or full veiling. A vertical look being narrow and slim is complemented by a hair design of the same lines; it could be a bob tucked behind the ears or a narrow pile of curls on top of the head."

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Hair Tips: Long, Medium, and Short Hair

2006-08-05T17:45:00.000-07:00

Bridal hairstyles need to reflect the brides' personality and personal style.

Long Hair - If your hair is long and you wear it pulled back most of the time than an elegant updo would be just the look. Natural curls? Enhance them and work with them; keep your look soft.

Straight hair? Don’t expect a set to last all day, wear it up. If the curls are pinned in place there will be less worry.

Medium Hair - If your hair is medium in length it can be curled and worn with a sparkly headband or tiara to dress it up. Or simply tuck some hair behind your ears and use one of the very popular decorative hair clips to hold it back.

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Tips for Getting Your Hair Done at the Salon

2006-08-02T23:21:00.000-07:00

Schedule your wedding day hair appointment at least eight weeks ahead.

Have a practice session at least a month ahead and bring a picture of your dress and your headpiece with you to the salon.

Record your travel time from the salon to where you are getting dressed. Add on extra time for getting dressed and make-up if the salon is not applying it.

Bring a Polaroid camera to your hair appointment and take pictures of the front, side, and back.

Ask for more than one stylist to help with the wedding party. Three stylists for a party of six is the best bet for staying on schedule.

Schedule all nail appointments for the day before, this also saves time.

Getting Along

2006-08-01T22:27:00.000-07:00

Planning your wedding can be a stressful time in your life. Here are a few ideas to keep the love flowing between you and your intended.

Don’t Call Names. Labels do nothing but create anger and hostility, and will certainly not help to find a solution over cutting the guest list.

Don’t Blame. When something is wrong, choose your words wisely. It is important to use words like "I feel" instead of saying something like "You’re wrong".

Listen. Marriage Counselors agree that the biggest complaint in struggling relationships is that one partner feels as though the other one isn’t listening.

Apologize and Forgive. Don’t be so filled up with pride that you won’t ask for forgiveness.

Be Thoughtful and Flexible. Next week you are scheduled to meet with three vendors, on your fiancé's birthday. Show him how much you appreciate him and reschedule some appointments and plan a fun night out.

Take a Break. It’s important for both of you to take a break from wedding planning.

Getting Rid of Pre-Ceremony Stress

2006-07-31T23:10:00.000-07:00

To help rid yourself of these stresses and to help fight that nauseating feeling as you walk down the aisle, here are some tips:

Take a brisk walk around the block, up the street, wherever.

Take a few moments each day, preferably at night before going to sleep, and do breathing exercises. Yes, the same ones moms do when they are in delivery.

Start drinking more water instead of caffeine and sugar loaded liquids. Reduce salt intake.

Laughing and singing are great ways to reduce the stress.

Another stress reducer is to stretch your muscles out. Do leg and arm stretches to help tone and to remove built up tensions in your muscles. Head and neck rolls can do wonders while sitting all day in an office!

Dim the lights in the bathroom and take a nice, hot bath.

One glass of wine can help you to relax, but don't overdo it.

If you prefer, that old home remedy of warm milk will do it every time!

Wedding Budgeting & Organization, articles on

2006-07-31T17:17:00.000-07:00

A Wedding Countdown Planner
Groom’s Countdown Checklist
Expenses your wedding attendants cover
Wedding Expenses: Groom and his family
Wedding Expenses: Bride and her family
Typical Wedding Party Plan
Defining your Wedding Budget
Setting A Budget For Your Wedding
Bouquets and Corsages
Tips on Decorating at the Ceremony
Tips for Decorating the Reception
Reasons to Limit your Guest List
How to Cut Your Guest List
Questions to Ask Your Caterer
Caterer requests
Catering Tips
How much Liquor to Buy?
Creative Wedding Favors
Instead of a Guest Book
Wedding Photos

Charity and Weddings

2006-07-29T22:20:00.000-07:00

Include Philanthropy on your "to do" list

Ways to Give Back

Healthier to Give than Receive

Healthier to Give than Receive

2006-07-29T15:04:00.000-07:00

That old adage about feeling good when you do something for someone else apparently has more than an emotional ring to it. Engaging in even a scant amount of altruistic behavior increases longevity, a University of Michigan study has found.

The five-year examination of 423 older couples found that those who reported helping someone else even only once a year were between 40 percent and 60 percent less likely to die than those who reported helping no one at all during the previous 365 days.

The type of help varied widely and included assisting family members who didn't live in the same place, babysitting for grandchildren, for example.

The researchers also looked at emotional support between spouses and found that those who were able to make their spouse feel loved and cared for also lived longer than those who denied their emotional support.

Although it's not known how the act of being helpful and kind to others increases your life expectancy, there are some theories:
"Giving may induce positive feelings" and buffer cardiovascular effects.
"You can derive physical and psychological benefits from knowing you are making someone else's life worthwhile."

Wedding Attendants, articles regarding

2006-07-29T14:35:00.000-07:00

Wedding and Reception Duties: Maid/Matron of Honor
Ushers' Responsibilities
Responsibilities of the Best Man
Responsibilities of Bridesmaids
What to keep in mind when choosing your Wedding Party
Selecting your Bridesmaids
How to treat your Bridesmaids
Maid of Honor Responsibilities
Best Man Responsibilities
When to have kids in the wedding party
Tips for including children in weddings
More helpful hints when kids are in wedding party
To cooperate, kids need praise and understanding
Kids at the Reception

Wedding Ceremony, articles on the

2006-07-26T18:46:00.000-07:00

Wedding Ceremony Itinerary
Coordinating the Wedding Day
What your Ushers should know
The Processional
Coordination once the Ceremony is over
Order of Events in the Recessional
How NOT to Faint at the Altar
Alternative Exits for the Bride and Groom
Order of Events for a Wedding Reception
Your Wedding Reception
Best Man’s Speech
Tips For Making a Wedding Toast
The Wedding Toast

The Night Before Your Wedding

2006-07-24T22:54:00.000-07:00

DON’T drink a lot of alcohol at the rehearsal dinner. Limit yourself to a glass of wine or champagne for toasting at dinner. Instead, drink plenty of water – it will make you feel and look good for your wedding day.

DO eat a good dinner. Don’t just nibble – you’ll need plenty of energy for the day ahead. Stay away from spicy foods or rich, heavy desserts. They may give you indigestion and stop you from getting a good night’s sleep.

DON’T go out after the rehearsal dinner. There will be lots of friends, relatives and out-of-town guests that will want to see you – but resist the temptation and go home directly after the rehearsal dinner.

After the rehearsal dinner, DO spend time with people that are close to you… your parents, your bridesmaids or your fiancé. Try not to be around people that can be annoying or cause you any stress.

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Honeymoon Tips

2006-07-23T12:02:00.000-07:00

Honeymoons are a major expense, too, and fraught with expectations. With that in mind, here are six tips to plan a getaway that pleases both of you.

Start planning early. Six months ahead isn't too soon to start.

Share your expectations. Allow time to dream, collect brochures, clip magazine and newspaper articles, and share ideas. Once each knows what the other wants, you can start looking for a compromise.

Create a realistic budget. Because so many honeymooners are novice travelers, they get sticker shock when they find out how much it really costs to travel to exotic destinations. You can stretch your budget by visiting popular destinations or high-end resorts during their low season.

Splurge on special extras. Pay extra for a spectacular ocean view. After all, you'll spend a lot of time in your room.

Respect each other's travel style. He loves to rough it in the wilds, but she'd prefer more civilized surroundings. Both would probably be happy at an eco-lodge in the wilderness.

It's OK to spend some time apart. You don't have to spend every minute gazing into each other's eyes. In fact, you'll probably want a break from each other's company. He can spend the morning on the golf course while she unwinds in the spa, or she can take scuba lessons while he lounges on the beach with the latest John Grisham novel.

Storing your wedding gown

2006-07-22T17:49:00.000-07:00

Many women save their wedding gowns as a keepsake or to hand down to their daughters, and if that's what you're planning make sure you do it right. The Whirlpool Institute of Fabric Science offers this advice for brides to ensure that their gowns will remain as beautiful as they were on the big day:

Have your gown cleaned within a few weeks of the ceremony. The longer stains and soil are left on the gown, the more likely it is that they'll be permanent.

Talk to a professional, a preservation specialist who is trained in textile conservation or a dry cleaner trained in cleaning and preparing gowns for storage. They can identify stains, even ones you can't see.

Don't keep your gown in a plastic bag, which will break down over time and release chemicals and fumes that can discolor and ruin fabrics.

If you're storing your gown in a box, wrap it first in acid-free white tissue. Stuff the bodice or other curved areas with tissue to prevent creasing.

Use an acid-free box, too, but be prepared to change it every three to five years. Even acid-free can reacidfy over time.

Store your gown in a cool, dry place -- not a hot, humid attic that can cause mildew and yellowing.

Keep your gown away from sunlight and artificial light that cause degradation and fading.

If you plan on hanging your gown, wrap it in a white sheet or muslin first and hang with the inside loops that are connected to the side seams. Never hang it by the shoulder seams.

Check your gown occasionally for damage. Stains that aren't visible can appear later and should be treated immediately.

Caring for your diamond ring

2006-07-20T23:09:00.000-07:00

To be sure your diamonds always sparkle, it is important to clean them periodically. Some suggestions:

Soaking your jewelry in a small bowl of warm, sudsy water using any mild liquid detergent. Gently brush the diamond jewelry with a soft toothbrush while it is in the suds. Then rinse each piece under warm running water. Pat the jewelry with a soft, lint-free cloth. Make sure to always stopper your sink.

An ammonia bath will also do the trick. Place the jewelry in a small bowl containing a half-and-half solution of ammonia and cold water for 30 minutes. Lift out and gently tap around the front and back of the mounting with a small soft brush. Swish in the solution a second time, rinse and drain on tissue paper.

Use any brand-name liquid jewelry cleaner and follow the instruction given on the label.

No one is sure how it was actually discovered, but it is safe to say that at some point someone took the idea of a "vodka on the rocks" literally and discovered an imaginative way to clean their precious diamonds. Simply let the diamond soak in a glass of vodka. Remember not to make a martini while you're cleaning your ring.

You can include philanthropy on your "to do" list

2006-07-20T17:29:00.000-07:00

At a time in their lives when couples are traditionally on the receiving end, more of them are finding ways to give as well.

Over 60 percent of couples live together before they get married, so the whole idea of a traditional gift registry is a little out of sync.

So consider a charitable Gift Registry. Couples can register at stores such as JCPenney, Target and Linens 'N Things, with their agreementagreed to donate up to 8 percent of each gift sale to the couple's favorite charity.

And instead of gifts, couples can send out a note asking invitees to consider honoring them by donating to one of their favorite charities.

People are sensing that if you are spending $22,000 on a six-hour event, there needs to be some component that's not just about them, but about their community.

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Ways to Give Back

2006-07-18T22:59:00.000-07:00

Choose a reception location owned by a nonprofit, such as a nature preserve, university or museum, where the rental proceeds will go to a good cause.

Think green: To create a wedding that is beautiful and environmentally sound, incorporate Earth-friendly practices into your ceremony and reception. (www.organicweddings.com)

Consider donations in place of gifts. Give your guests the option of donating to your favorite charity. Combine a donation registry with your gift registry. (www.idofoundation.org) (www.justgive.org)

Choose charitable wedding-guest favors. Make a donation in honor of your guests in place of wedding favors, or consider a favor such as a seedling or plant.

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A Wedding Countdown Planner

2006-07-16T22:59:00.000-07:00

For a very helpful, suggested Wedding Countdown Planner, covering things to do:
12 months before the wedding
6 months before the wedding
2 months before the wedding
1 month before the wedding
2 weeks before the wedding
The week before the wedding
And the day before your wedding

click for article

Groom’s Countdown Checklist

2006-07-16T00:42:00.000-07:00

Here'a a simple checklist of what a groom needs to do, beginning months before the event, to ensure that the wedding goes smoothly.

12 to 18 Months Before
Meet with both sets of parents to discuss the budget and style of the wedding.
Go with your fiancée and book the reception site.
Reserve your ceremony location.
Choose your groomsmen.

9 Months Before
Decide on an Officiant.
Write out a preliminary guest list.

6 Months Before
Choose and order your attire and your groomsmen’s outfits.
Plan and book your honeymoon.

3 Months Before
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What expenses do your wedding attendants cover?

2006-07-14T22:33:00.000-07:00

The Attendants cover:

Tuxedos and Bridesmaids Gowns

Their own travel expenses

Wedding gift for the couple

P.S. The Guests are expected to cover their own travel expenses, in addition to a wedding gift for the couple.

Wedding Expenses: The Groom and his family

2006-07-14T08:33:00.000-07:00

The Groom and The Groom's family traditionally cover:

Bride's engagement and wedding ring
Gift for the bride
Marriage license
Bachelor dinner party
Gifts for best man and ushers
Flowers: bride's bouquet; corsages; boutonnieres
Accommodations for visiting ushers and best man
Fee for the clergy
The honeymoon
Transportation to honeymoon
Wedding attire for mother and father of the groom
Tuxedos for the best man groomsmen and ushers
Personal traveling expenses
Wedding gift for the newlyweds
Hosting a rehearsal dinner

Wedding Expenses: The Bride and her family

2006-07-12T22:43:00.000-07:00

Traditionally, the Bride and her family cover:
Groom’s Wedding Ring
Gift for the groom
Gifts for each of her attendants
Accommodations for visiting guests
Personal stationery, thank-you cards
Flowers: bridesmaids bouquets, flower girl, church/reception
Physical examination/blood test
Bridesmaids' luncheon
Bride's wedding dress, lingerie, and accessories (trousseau)
Wedding invitations/announcements/mailing costs
Wedding gift for the newlyweds
Wedding photography
Ceremony: rental of site, fees for organist or soloist, aisle carpet, flowers and other decorations
Bridesmaids' gowns and bouquets
Reception: all food, beverages, wedding cake, decorations, music, flowers, gratuities, etc.
Transportation to the wedding ceremony and reception.

Typical Wedding Party Plan

2006-07-11T22:16:00.000-07:00

2:00 PM-The Ceremony: Congratulations! You are married and the party is about to begin.

3:00 PM-The Receiving Line: Couples today often forgo this tradition, but it is one way to make sure you greet each guest.

3:30 PM-Cocktails: This is the first chance for everybody to mix and mingle and to preview the style of your party. (You may want to be taking photos during this time.)

4:30 PM-Dinner: Guests find their places at the tables.

4:45 PM-The First Dance: The bride and groom glide across the dance floor to their special song.

5:15 PM-The Toasts: The best man raises his glass, and often the newlyweds say a few words, too. (If you have more than 100 guests, you may want to have the toast on the lawn during cocktail hour.)

7:00 PM-Cutting the Cake: With his hand over hers, the newlyweds slice the cake together, then share the first piece.

7:30 PM-Tossing the Bouquet: When the bride parts with her bouquet, the one who catches it is said to be the next to marry.

7:45 PM-Going Away: The newlyweds depart amidst a great whoop-la from the guests. Afterwards guests head for their cars, or those assigned help with packing up. Meanwhile caterers and vendors begin clean up.

Defining your wedding budget

2006-07-10T22:56:00.000-07:00

To define your budget you need to set priorities. The bride and groom should discuss which elements of the wedding are most important to them. For instance, is it the reception location, the bridal gown, or the entertainment that is most important? You should choose about 3-4 items that are your top priorities and set the rest of your budget from there. It's more likely that you will spend more of your wedding budget on those items you consider a higher priority.

Your reception, including the food and beverages, can average 50-65% of your total budget. Therefore, the reception location you select and how many guests you invite will have the most impact on your budget.

Let's say that the average wedding costs in your area is between $12,000-$19,000. Here's a recommended guideline based on a $15,000 wedding budget for about 100-125 guests:

Reception Site, Food & Beverages 50% -- $ 7,450
Photography & Videography 13% -- $ 2,000
Music 11% -- $ 1,600
Apparel 10% -- $ 1,500
Flowers 7% -- $ 1,000
Invitations 2% ---- $ 350
Wedding Cake 2% ---- $ 300
Transportation 2% ---- $ 300
Miscellaneous 3% ---- $ 500

Setting A Budget For Your Wedding

2006-07-09T00:40:00.000-07:00

When it's time to talk dollars and cents, unless you're one of a chosen few, where the "skies the limit", you need to set a budget for your wedding.

First, you’ve got to determine two things:
How much money you want to spend on your wedding?
Who will be contributing to the wedding and how much?

The traditional rule of the bride’s family paying for the entire wedding is fast becoming history. Today, there is much more sharing of expenses between the bride's family, the groom's family and the bride and groom.

Many couples are getting married later in life and are well established with their own careers. These brides and grooms are able to pay for more of the expenses and sometimes want to pay for the entire wedding themselves.

continued

Bouquets and Corsages

2006-07-07T22:24:00.000-07:00

Keep in mind, that if the bouquets are too big, they will cover up part of your dress in the pictures. And, if it's very large and overpowering, then people's eyes will be drawn to the flowers, and not to the bride's face.

To save money and give a sophisticated look to the wedding, have your bridesmaids carry a few white calla lilies or roses tied with ribbon.

Want to save big money on your bridal bouquet or bridesmaids' bouquets? Make them yourself! Visit your local craft supply store. They have bunches of lovely dried and silk flowers. You can use dried tea roses and baby's breath. They'll last longer, are less expensive than real flowers, and they have a wonderful scent!

For a great (and cost effective) alternative for a corsage... have the mothers' carry a single rose wrapped in tulle or ribbon. It looks beautiful and elegant as they walk down the aisle AND they don't have to worry about where to pin it or if it will leave a hole in their dress!

Half the cost of your flowers is labor. The more labor intensive the bouquet or centerpiece, the higher you can expect the bill to be. To cut costs, stay with simple looser type arrangements.

When choosing flowers for your wedding, consider a "market buy" option. This is when your florist will go to the market the day before your wedding and purchase flowers that are on special. Your florist should be able to give you a pretty good idea of what to expect. You can save a significant amount of money and still have beautiful flowers for your wedding!

read more

Tips for Decorating the Reception

2006-07-06T14:21:00.000-07:00

Use your bridal bouquet and bridesmaids' bouquets as floral decorations at the reception. You can use them as the centerpiece for the head table or you can place them at the cake table, gift table, guest book table, favor or place card table.

If you have a large area to decorate, consider purchasing or renting shrubs, trees or plants. It is much less expensive than using large floral arrangements and still looks very attractive.

Lighting can really help set the right mood for your reception. Small white lights delicately placed within swags of greenery along a staircase or entwined in large potted plants can really add a soft and romantic look to the reception.

Use a lot of greenery! Use swags of greenery mixed with tulle. Swags of greenery with a few fresh flowers added.

Choose a smaller floral centerpiece. Then, add ribbons, candles and/or mirror plates to make your centerpiece look larger and more elaborate.

Tips on decorating at the Ceremony

2006-07-05T00:46:00.000-07:00

Focus your "wedding dollars" where they will get the most attention. For instance, when choosing flowers for the ceremony - focus on the altar because that is where your guests will focus their attention.

If you need to cut your flower bill...think about reducing the amount of flowers at the ceremony. Wedding ceremonies are usually less than an hour and the majority of your time will be spent at the reception.

Decorating every pew on both sides? Try decorating every other pew or every 3rd pew. You can add some hurricane lamps. You can use ribbon and bows mixed with lots of greenery too.

At the ceremony - use plenty of tall candelabras, which the church may already have, and decorate with greenery. When those candles are burning, and showing off the greenery --Wow! It's beautiful.

More brides today are doing without aisle runners. It's not always easy to put down the runner properly and there have been a few instances where the runner has gotten caught up underneath a wedding dress!

Reasons to Limit your Guest List

2006-07-04T00:23:00.000-07:00

Fewer guests equals less stress.

You'll have more room at the tables.

You'll have more of it spend with each of your special guests.

Everyone can get up close and personal to your ceremony. No one has to sit all the way in the back and have her view obstructed. Everyone will be able to hear every vow.

You don't need to rent the convention center.

Cutting guests lets you serve more elegant foods or bigger portions.

Read more

How to Cut Your Guest List

2006-07-02T22:47:00.000-07:00

Most of us can't afford a wedding in which we invite everyone. So, often comes the time for some difficult decisions over who should be cut from the guest list.

The first step is to go through your guest list and put an "A" or a "B" next to each name. The A's are the absolute "must invites" and the B list is everyone else.

The next step -- Cut the "B list". Ask yourself these three questions:
Have I seen this person in the last 12 months?
Have I spoken with this person in the last 6 months?
Did I send this person a Christmas card last year?

If you answered "no" to all of the questions above, it's probably a good idea to cut this person from your guest list.

Read more

Questions to Ask Your Caterer

2006-07-01T23:38:00.000-07:00

Here are some great questions to ask your caterer to ensure that you have a great wedding feast without any surprises!

Budget - Let your caterer know your budget up front. Don’t assume that a buffet or food stations is less expensive than a sit down dinner.

Food Preparation - Does the caterer use all fresh food and produce? Will any of the food for the reception be previously frozen? Most of the "top notch" caterers do not use any frozen foods or anything that comes from a can!

Taste Testing - Ask if your caterer will do a "tasting". This is where the bride and groom can go sample and taste some of the caterer’s dishes.

Guaranteed Numbers - Many caterers will quote prices based upon a certain number or minimum number of guests. For instance, many caterers base their figures on a minimum of 100 guests. If you’re final guest count is for only 80 guests, there may be an additional fee.

Wedding Cake - Do they offer wedding cakes? Is a wedding cake included in the price? Is there an additional cake cutting fee?

Read more

Caterer requests

2006-06-30T22:23:00.000-07:00

Ask your caterer to prepare a "leftover basket" that is a sampling of all the food at your reception. It's likely that the bride and groom will not get a chance to eat and enjoy all of the wonderful food and if you're leaving the next day on your honeymoon, it makes for a great late night snack.

Be sure to ask your caterer about "guaranteed numbers". Many caterers will quote prices based upon a minimum or "guaranteed" number of guests. Many base their figures on a minimum of 100 guests. If your final guest count is less than a hundred, there may be an additional fee.

Find out what decorations (if any) are included in the caterer’s price. Ask to see pictures of their table displays. Some caterers that do buffets or food stations will include floral arrangements and other decorations.

A recent trend when doing buffets or food stations is to have a menu board. This is where the names of the entrees (and sometimes a brief description) and items served are scrolled elegantly onto a piece of paper displayed on a board or in a picture frame.

Catering Tips

2006-06-29T22:42:00.000-07:00

As far as wedding expenses go, your catering or food bill is typically your largest expense (45-50% of most wedding budgets).

Therefore, choose your caterer carefully. Spend plenty of time with your caterer talking about your budget, the style of reception you’d like (i.e. buffet, food stations, sit down dinner or cocktail reception) and the types of food that you’d like to serve.

Check References! Many brides ask for references but never call them. Make at least TWO reference phone calls. Don’t by shy, remember -- brides love to talk about their wedding!

Service is an extremely important element when choosing your caterer. Be sure to ask about the ratio of servers to guests. Now, this can vary depending on the type of reception you have (seated dinner versus buffet). One good rule of thumb is to have one server for every 8-10 guests.

When determining a final head count for your caterer, you should include a meal for your entertainer (DJ or Band), photographer and Wedding Day Coordinator. But, always confirm with these vendors that they do want a meal before you include them in your head count. And, make sure to separate these from your guest head count because your caterer will usually charge you less for "vendor" meals.

How much liquor to buy?

2006-06-29T14:05:00.000-07:00

In planning your wedding, if you have the option to purchase your own liquor for the bar, that can save lots of money!

The suggested Liquor Amounts per 100 guests:

Beer - Total 9 Cases: Domestic 3 cases / Imported 3 cases /Lite 3 cases

Wine - Total 5-8 Cases: Chardonnay 3-4 Cases / White Zinfandel 1-2 Cases / Cabernet Sauvignon 1-2 Cases

Champagne: 1-2 Cases

And don't forget lots of the ice!

Read more

Creative Wedding Favors

2006-06-28T09:38:00.000-07:00

These days brides are being more creative and are letting their imaginations run wild when it comes to wedding favors, from personalized chocolates to potted plants!

Wedding favor ideas can range from:

Giving each guest a bottle of bubble blowing mixture, so bubbles can then be blown by guests instead of throwing confetti.

Potpourri.

Small terracotta pots and packets of mixed flower seed.

Fans.

Chocolate "coffee spoons" to stir coffee.

A poem in a scroll.

read more

Instead of a Guest Book

2006-06-26T23:44:00.000-07:00

Consider a twist on the old idea of a guest book.

Purchase a Polaroid camera and plenty of film. As guests come in, have one or two people take pictures of them. Then have them sign their names along the bottom of the picture and stick it in the photo album.

Cut squares of material and purchase fabric crayons. Have guests decorate and sign a square. After your wedding, bring it to a seamstress for the creation of a decorative wedding quilt.

Enlarge a picture of you and your fiancé. Many couples use their engagement photo. Have the guests sign the picture or a mat that will go around the picture. After the wedding, frame it and hang it in your home.

Create a wedding scrapbook. Glue in pictures of you and your fiancé, as well as any other creative and memorable stories or images. Leave plenty of space for guests to write little messages to you within the book.

Print a poem about love in the middle of a large, decorative piece of paper. Have your guests sign around it. When it’s done, frame it and hang it up in your home.

Have your guests sign an unfinished ceramic platter. After the wedding, bring the platter to a ceramics place or even a place that holds such crafts classes and have them glaze it and bake it. You could either hang it in your home or actually use it for serving meals.

Wedding Photos

2006-06-26T00:35:00.000-07:00

Your wedding photos will be a treasure for years to come.

Full length pictures capture all the beauty and magnificence of the wedding dress, wedding attire and beautiful scenery or backdrops.

Close-up or half length (above the waist) photographs better capture facial expressions and reveal more emotion.

For a full list of photograph possibilities that your photographer can take at your wedding, click below. You can just print out the list, check off the pictures that you want and then give the list to your photographer.

List of photos

Ushers' Responsibilities

2006-06-24T22:43:00.000-07:00

Ushers are:

Responsible for their own attire

Involved in all ceremony festivities

Greet all guests at the ceremony, ask which family they represent and seat them accordingly.

Usually two of the ushers unroll the aisle runner after the bride's mother is seated

Responsibilities of the Best Man

2006-06-24T00:25:00.000-07:00

The Best Man is the Groom's right-hand man and main problem-solver.

Among his responsibilitiues, he's:
Responsible for his tuxedo
In charge of groom arriving on time
Sees that ushers' function runs smoothly
Gives toast and special speeches at ceremony and reception
Pays the officiant's fee
Keeps rings, license, and honeymoon tickets in a safe place
Acts as toastmaster at the bridal table
Plans for reception exit transportation

Responsibilities of Bridesmaids

2006-06-23T09:46:00.000-07:00

Bridesmaids:

Are generally responsible for their own gowns

Assist in all pre-wedding festivities

Wrap small gifts for the reception favors (optional)

Fill cups with confetti, rice, or rose petals to throw for the getaway

Decorate the cars

Wedding and Reception Duties: Maid/Matron of Honor

2006-06-22T11:11:00.000-07:00

The Maid/Matron of Honor is the Bride's right-hand woman. She's responsible for:

Her own gown and accessories
Helps arrange bridal shower
Keeps a record of shower and wedding gifts
Acts as official witness
Unofficially calms the bride's nerves
Helps bridesmaids on wedding day
Rearranges train before recessional
Holds bride's bouquet and possibly gloves during ceremony
Cares for bride's things at ceremony and reception
Assists the bride when changing from her wedding gown to her going-away apparel

What to keep in mind when choosing your Wedding Party

2006-06-20T15:51:00.000-07:00

Choose your attendants carefully. You especially want your bridesmaids to be:

* RELIABLE - Show up for fittings when they are scheduled. Be on time for the rehearsal and the ceremony!

* ACCOMMODATING – Able to wear a dress that may not be their “ideal choice” and NOT complain!

* HELPFUL - Willing to help out with any wedding details, errands, shopping or help putting together favors.

Selecting your Bridesmaids

2006-06-19T10:33:00.000-07:00

How can you possibly choose between sisters, college rommates, co-workers? While it’s great to have all those close friends, 20 bridesmaids isn’t exactly what you had in mind.

Below are a few tips for selecting your bridal party.

Choose family over friends. Friendships come and go, but your family will be a part of your life for a long time to come. In addition, friends will understand if they are not chosen because of family obligations.

Less is more. The more people you choose to be a part of your bridal party, the more opinions you will have to consider, the more difficult it is to schedule events and fittings, and the more expensive it is for you!

Generally, you need to figure that you should have one groomsman for every 50 guests. Since the amount of groomsmen and bridesmaids are usually equal, you can use that as a guideline.

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How to treat your Bridesmaids

2006-06-18T11:30:00.000-07:00

Brides need to remember that their wedding is indeed a special event, so the friends they ask to stand at their side should be special people. Not models, not picture frames, not servants. Friends.

You cannot demand that people bow to your whim because "it's my day."

The bride's behavior is directly responsible for the warm desires of others to shower her with parties.

If a friend turns down your request to be a bridesmaid, don't forever banish her out of your life. They may be doing you a favor by being honest with you.

Say "Thank you." It goes a long way, especially among friends.

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Maid of Honor Responsibilities

2006-06-17T15:52:00.000-07:00

Your Maid of Honor should be your closest friend - many times, a bride will choose her sister.

The main role of the Maid of Honor is to help the bride with the wedding planning... this can include shopping for dresses, addressing invitations, putting together favors and just being there when the bride needs some extra help, support or someone to talk to.

Traditionally, there are some specific duties that the maid of honor is to perform:

Host the bridal shower. Today, this is usually done with the help of the other bridesmaids.

Helps the bride get dressed on her wedding day.

Adjusts the bride's veil and train before she walks down the aisle and during the ceremony as needed.

Holds the bride's bouquet during the wedding ceremony.

Read more

Best Man Responsibilities

2006-06-09T09:26:00.000-07:00

The groom selects his Best Man. It is typically his brother, father, a close relative or friend.

In the case of a second marriage, he can even choose his son to be his Best Man.

The Best Man plays an important role. The best man's responsibilities depend largely on who the best man is and how much responsibility and other tasks YOU would like him to perform.

The Best Man may be responsible for:

Getting the groom to the church

Holding onto the rings

Giving the first toast to the bride and groom

more responsibilities

To cooperate, kids need praise and understanding

2006-06-08T19:23:00.000-07:00

Put yourself in the child's place you have chosen to participate in your wedding.

To get a child through the rehearsal dinner, sleep a good night's rest the night before, then alter their morning routine, and put on scratchy strange clothes and hard new shoes, sit for their hairstyle, keep a "thing" on top of their head, get through per-ceremony pictures, hold a basket and not loose it, drop petals, walk slow, walk straight, and then two hours later be expect to be clean, still and quiet for more pictures?

This is not possible for many adults!

A calm easygoing bride is the best medicine for the child and also helps to relax the mother as well.

Keeping your expectations low and having a go with the flow attitude is the best strategy for the bride to be.

Above all, remember that children need praise. Praise them for their performance and thank them for their cooperation. They will react accordingly. All they need is a little love!

More helpful hints when kids are in wedding party

2006-06-07T16:44:00.000-07:00

Keep the kids at another location for dressing and preparation.

Make sure videos and snacks are available and kid friendly.

Dress them at the last possible minute.

Scuff up the new shoes on the bottom with sandpaper and let the kids break them in ahead of time.

If Mom is in the wedding make sure she gets ready first!

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Tips for including children in weddings

2006-06-06T10:32:00.000-07:00

Inviting children to take part in your celebration can make it even more special. However, the last thing you want to worry about is your flower girl and ring bearer becoming impatient, restless or fidgety on the day of the wedding. Here are some helpful tips to ensure that the day goes smoothly...

1. As a general rule, when choosing children to take part in your wedding as a flower girl or ring bearer, it is usually best (or at least more predictable) to have children ages four and above.

2. In the weeks before the wedding day, talk to your flower girl and ring bearer about the events that will take place before and throughout the wedding day. Explain what they will wear, where they will go and what they will have to do. The better young attendants can visualize their role in the wedding, the better prepared they will be to cooperate and participate as you would like them to.

3. Choose outfits for the flower girl and ring bearer that are comfortable. Choose comfortable fabrics - - ones that don't scratch or irritate the skin. Be sure the children wear comfortable shoes, and if the shoes are new - that they have a chance to "break them in" prior to the wedding day.

4. Invite all of your young attendants and their parents to the rehearsal. Let the children practice walking down the aisle several times so that they will feel more comfortable of their role on the "big day".

more tips

When to have kids in the wedding party

2006-06-04T11:14:00.000-07:00

1. They are your own children. By all means they should be a part of this special event. By being included and involved they will feel more secure about their significance and place in your new life.

2. You really love children! You love their spontaneity and if they do something silly you think it will just add more charm and laughs to your day.

3. You are getting married early in the day. Kids are better when it is not too late in the day.

4. The children are local and can sleep in their own bed the night before.

5. You can pass on a few details, such as how their hair looks. Requesting a specific hairstyle for the flower girl can get tricky. Not every child's hair will hold a curl, nor will they sit long enough to get it done.

more

Kids at the Reception

2006-06-03T10:40:00.000-07:00

Under 5-year-olds: Seat a family with young children with other families who are also bringing young children. If the little ones starts crying, they tend to be more understanding then say, a group of single 20-somethings.

Ages 5 - 10: If you have enough kids in this age group to fill a table, consider seating them together. Appoint or hire a babysitter for the table.

If you choose to have a kid's table, cover it with a paper tablecloth so they can draw on it. For a centerpiece, provide a bucket of crayons, several cartons of play-dough or travel games.

Ages 11-16: This is the age where a kid will walk 15 feet behind their parents for fear of being associated with the "most embarrassing human beings alive." Do them a favor and seat this age group together. While you probably don't need an adult at their table, place them at a table next to adults who won't let them misbehave.

read more

Wedding Ceremony Itinerary

2006-06-01T10:30:00.000-07:00

A general outline of the sequence of events for a traditional Wedding Ceremony.

The Processional
The Welcome, Call to Worship
Questions of Intent
Declaration of Consent
Readings and Music
Wedding Vows
Exchange of the Rings
Pronouncement of the Marriage Benediction, Prayers and Blessing
Recessional

For more on all the above

What ushers should know

2006-05-28T20:40:00.000-07:00

All ushers should be at the location about 45-60 minutes before the ceremony will begin. Upon their arrival, they should put on their boutonnieres if they haven’t already.

Ushers should smile, be friendly, and greet the guests as they escort them to their seats.

Traditionally, the usher offers his right arm to the woman (the oldest woman if a group or family is being escorted.

Another option: the ushers can walk the guests to their seats rather than offering their arm.

Family and friends of the bride are seated on the left side of the aisle (facing the altar) and the groom’s family and friends on the right. If one side becomes more full than the other, the ushers should begin seating guests on the other side.

Read more

The Processional

2006-05-22T22:11:00.000-07:00

The following is a typical order to a Wedding Processional. It can certainly be modified based on your particular situation.

The groom, best man and Officiant enter by using a side door. They all stand facing the guests.

An usher escorts the grandmother(s)of the bride to their seats.

An usher escorts the grandmother(s)of the groom to their seats.

An usher escorts the mother of the groom to her seat.

An usher escorts the mother of the bride to her seat.

The ushers walk down the aisle (or escort the bridesmaids) and stand next the groom and best man and then face the guests.

continued

10 Questions for those contemplating marriage

2006-05-18T12:14:00.000-07:00

1. Is the person you're marrying your best friend or at least becoming so? If the person you marry does not become your best friend, you will either seek someone who will be or simply drift apart.

2. Do you miss the person when you are not together?

3. Aside from sex, do you enjoy each other?

4. How much of your love is dependent on the sex you are having?

5. Does the person have a number of good friends and at least one very close friend of the same sex?

6. How does the person treat others? How the person treats others now is how this person will treat you later.

7. What do people you respect think of the person you're considering marrying? You would do so regarding the purchase of a car, wouldn't you? Yet no car will affect your life nearly as much as your spouse.

8. What problems do the two of you now have? Whatever problems you have before the wedding day, you will have during your marriage.

9. How often do you fight? It may be normal for couples to fight, but it is usually a bad sign if you are doing so with any frequency while dating.

10. Do you share values? The more you share, the better your chances of a good marriage.

Be true to yourself, and your potential spouse

2006-05-15T13:45:00.000-07:00

One of the reasons that people divorce is because they find themselves married to people who are very different from the ones they were dating.

For example, when Susan was dating Bruce, he was the perfect gentleman and very helpful with her household chores. She likewise was always smiling, sweet smelling and attentive to his every move. After they were married, Bruce turned into a slovenly couch potato while Susan turned into a nag.

The truth is , they were both always that way. They just refused to show that side to each other because they didn’t want to lose the relationship.

The point is that all too often marriage can become the time to unleash everyone’s worst behavior and bad habits.

Folks, if you’re aiming to make your happy ever after last your lifetimes and not just a couple of years, you need to be true to yourself and to each other.

Everybody has expectations and non-negotiables. The sooner you know which is which, the better it will be for your marriage.

Communication is the key here. It means seriously discussing what you are willing to do for each other, whether it be chores or finances, and what is just utterly unacceptable.

You’ll get to know each other better in the process and have a more stable foundation for your married life.

The First Dance

2006-05-13T22:44:00.000-07:00

One of the best things about weddings, it’s your party, and you are automatically king and queen of the event! Traditionally, for the First Dance, you’ll be doing the two step. Basically that means picking a song that you can sway and take two steps to as you stand on the floor.

If you're not a ballroom dancer, you might want to learn to dance one very special number. Hire a choreographer if you need one. And show off!

If you’ve only danced modern dances, you’ll find that ballroom dances are truly a blending of the skills of two people. You need to work with your partners strengths and catch the rhythm together. It may take a lot of practice so that you move and look beautifully together. After all, dancing should be beautiful to watch as well as execute.

Of all ballroom dances, the waltz is the favorite for weddings. The good news is that it is fun and easy to learn. And also easy to dance in a wedding gown.

Or if you really dance well together, why not go for the drama of a tango and heat up the floor. Make it absolutely scorching!

Whichever dance you choose, have fun!

Wedding etiquette

2006-05-10T23:59:00.000-07:00

An engagement party may be hosted by the couple or either set of parents. Don’t expect a gift at this party.

If this is your second marriage and you have children, by all means include them in the wedding. One way is to let them give you away. It will make it a lot easier for them knowing you want them to be a part of it.

Wedding etiquette has changed. If it’s your second time around it’s alright to wear white.
If it’s your first time around it’s o.k. to wear a color.

The groom’s mother should talk to the bride’s mother about what she should wear. It’s only good wedding etiquette.

Everyone should feel comfortable at the reception. Use place cards at the tables so people will be with others that they are compatible with. Have a seating chart where they enter so that they don’t have to search for their table.

Receiving lines are not necessary at a small and informal wedding. You can just mingle and introduce people.

It is just not cool or good wedding etiquette to ask for cash only as a gift for your wedding. In fact it’s down-right tacky.

Your thank-you notes should be sent out within two to four weeks after the wedding. Don’t forget to mention the specific gift and how you plan to use it.

Wedding Themes

2006-05-06T22:38:00.000-07:00

Creating a wedding theme can be as simple as picking certain colors or as elaborate as your budget allows.

Some simple wedding themes you could consider:

Beach- Have everyone in the wedding party dressed in white linen or gauze. Or use aqua blues and sea greens. Decorate with seashells and sand. You can add beautiful shells to your cake too! Keep it natural and light.

Western wedding themes- Think bandanas, arriving on horseback, and barbecue food for the reception.

Midsummer- Wear flowers in your hair and keep the wedding party's clothes light. Use sunflowers and daises everywhere. An informal picnic in a garden-like setting.

Some tips on Wedding Vows

2006-05-04T21:41:00.000-07:00

Wedding vows are very personal and should reflect you and your fiancé’s personalities and feelings for each other. Having said that, you can:

Find pre-written vows and just fill in the blanks.

Write a letter to one another proclaiming you love and devotion.

Use poetry to express your feelings, or incorporate song lyrics that have special meaning to you and your fiancé.

Use Bible passages or writings from your faith in your vows.

Don’t forget to use your sense of humor where appropriate.

Use a short story about how you met or things you have in common to add a special touch.

Print your vows on pretty paper and distribute before the ceremony. Or print your vows on small cards and place at each setting in the reception.

Choosing a wedding location

2006-05-02T23:16:00.000-07:00

The secret to finding a beautiful and unique wedding location is to do your homework and some searching. You have choices no matter where you live.

When deciding on wedding locations you must consider whether or not you would like the wedding and reception to be at the same location or separate places. In many cases it is cheaper to remain in the same place.

Consider these unique places as an alternate to the usual banquet hall:

Small chapels in or around your area with a social hall for the reception.
Check out Historical Buildings in your town. They are often used for such occasions.
Garden settings are perfect for outdoor weddings.
Live near the water? Nothing is as beautiful as a wedding on the beach or lakeside.
Try a quaint Barn, Farm or Ranch for that country feel.

When you are making the big decision about wedding locations and/or wedding reception locations, consider your budget, of course, and perhaps tying in other elements of the wedding.

If you are going with a running theme, it might help you to narrow down the places that you would use.

Inexpensive wedding reception ideas

2006-04-30T22:01:00.000-07:00

A brunch reception at 11 a.m. of fruit, bread, muffins, mimosas and other breakfast foods

A luncheon reception follows a late morning wedding. You can easily make this food yourself, sandwiches (finger sandwiches are nice), green salad, pasta salad and fruit.

A dessert reception is the most inexpensive wedding reception food. The menu is self -explanatory. Just serve your favorite desserts, could even be made by you. This type of reception would be held from 2 to 5 p.m.

The cocktail party reception is less expensive than dinner and is held from 4 to 7 p.m. Serve hors d’ouvres. (Supermarkets offer hors d’ouvres trays pretty inexpensively. Redo them with your own garnish and make them really pretty.)

Then there's the dinner reception, but you can still save by serving it buffet style with a nice presentation.

Choosing flowers for your wedding

2006-04-28T22:14:00.000-07:00

Flowers symbolize the Spring of your new life together. What kind of flowers do you use?

Durability. You don’t want wilted flowers, do you? Consider the weather and temperature conditions. For example, fragile flowers won’t do well in the heat of summer, or will rumple in the strong breeze of a seaside ceremony and reception. Delicate blooms include gardenias, tulips, wild flowers, and lily of the valley.

Your motif. Choose flowers that match the theme and color scheme of your wedding. Give your florist a swatch from the cloth used for the dresses of your entourage, and inform her whether the wedding will be during the day or the night (it affects how formal the bouquets should be). You should also consider the venue itself: is it indoors or outdoors, casual or elegant?

Creativity. Roses and carnations are practically wedding staples. For a unique look, consider mixing them with other blooms, or asking for a particularly unique flower arrangement or bouquet style. Some florists will incorporate crystals, sinamay cloth, ribbons or lace.

Meaning. Some flowers are known to symbolize certain things. For example, tulips mean passion, gardenias mean joy, and orange blossoms mean purity.

Something new, something old

2006-04-27T22:12:00.000-07:00

On the day of the wedding, the bride is asked to wear or carry something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue. This tradition is a simple process and a sweet way for the women of the brides’ family, particularly the brides’ mom, to acknowledge the changing status of the bride and to show their love and support.

Usually the “something old” takes the form of some personal items given from mother to daughter, sometimes as accessories that the bride is to wear on the day such as a necklace or earrings.

The “something new” stands for the new family that is about to be formed, and bracelets are a common choice for this.

The “something borrowed” is supposed to come from a happily married women. By lending the bride something to use on her wedding day, they also lend some of their married bliss to carry into their new family.

Last, but not least, is the “something blue”. The color is associated with purity and modesty. While the color is pretty, it doesn’t quite go with all the white. Perfect solution: it is common nowadays to have a blue and white garter.

Where your wedding money goes

2006-04-26T22:25:00.000-07:00

Generally, the biggest expense you'll incur is your reception. It normally accounts for about 48% of your total expenses.

The next is the cost of getting your photos and video. A really good, professional photographer is expensive. But they do capture a once in a lifetime event.

Then comes the cost of your gown. Typically, it is usually a dress that you will only wear once, but it comes up to about 10% of the total expense for your wedding.

The flowers and decor takes about 8% of the bill, as does the music and entertainment.

The remainder of the wedding bill (19%) is split between the cost of your wedding rings, transportation, the invitations, the actual ceremony and your bride and groom gifts.

Wedding ceremony programs

2006-04-23T23:03:00.000-07:00

A wedding ceremony marks the beginning of a marriage, and a couple’s life together.

From the bride’s march down the aisle to the wedding reception, there are a number of wedding traditions and aspects that make a wedding ceremony special. It is important that the couple ‘include’ their guests and the people around them in the celebration by guiding and informing them of what is happening at any given time. This is made possible by wedding ceremony programs.

A wedding program is a personalized guidebook for the guests in a wedding. It is essentially similar to that of a program at a theater play, and serves the following purposes:

1. A record of the wedding ceremony, providing guests with the order and details of the events that will happen in the ceremony.
2. They help guests understand what is happening, making them feel included.

Wonderful, yet inexpensive wedding

2006-04-22T22:32:00.000-07:00

Is there such a thing as a wonderful, yet inexpensive wedding?

Spending your life savings on your big day is crazy. You can have an elegant, beautiful wedding without breaking the bank.

Do your online research and you’ll find suggestions for great weddings that are also relatively cheap weddings.

Cheap weddings doesn’t mean giving up style or sentimentality. It means using your imagination, using your own hands or the help of friends and family.

Planning a cheap wedding is still planning a dream wedding but having cash left over for other things. Consider that you could end up with money to put down on a house, or buy a car or take a fabulous honeymoon.

Bridal Shower Favors

2006-04-21T22:19:00.000-07:00

Your marriage is one the most significant events of your life. When you look back in forty or fifty years, you want to remember everything that happened on that special day.

The bridal shower is meant to be a special time for the bride, shared with close friends and family members. Whether it's your daughter, sister, cousin, niece, or best friend that's getting married, you want to make sure that it's a great event that will be remembered for a lifetime.

Bridal shower favors and wedding favors can be large or small, elegant or simple. There are also unique one-of-a-kind items that can't be found anywhere else.

Whatever you end up doing, make sure you have unique party favors that everyone will love!

[By Jon Wuebben]

Hire a videographer?

2006-04-20T23:22:00.000-07:00

Only half of brides surveyed before their wedding considered a video of their wedding a needed service.

When the questions was asked after the wedding, 75% of brides consider videography a top service.

Of those brides who decided to pass on a videographer, 63% now somewhat or strongly recommend to hire a professional videographer.

Why is it so important to hire a videographer? Well, those brides surveyed stressed how video captured the emotions of the day, recorded history better than photography, and that they would enjoy showing their children their wedding video over photographs.

Choosing a Florist

2006-04-20T00:04:00.000-07:00

Flowers can really enhance your affair. However, finding a florist is not that easy. A good florist will be busy, so book early, well before your wedding.

First, ask the location where you are having the reception at for the florists they recommend.

If that doesn't help, then ask friends and family for suggestions. Call friends whose weddings you've been to and whose florists created beautiful arrangements. Most importantly, ask if they had an easy time planning, and working with that florist.

Once you have gathered a few names, call and get price estimates and make appointments to see their work. Most good florists will not give an estimate over the phone.

When you meet with the florist it is good to bring some fabric from your bridesmaid's gowns, so that the florist can help you with the colors and types of flowers to use.

Reception themes and food

2006-04-19T00:17:00.000-07:00

The part of the wedding that takes the most preparation is usually the reception.

First, decide on a wedding theme, as this may help determine the food at your party. For example, if you go for a more traditional Mexican ceremony, you may wish to go with Mexican food at your reception.

On the other hand, you might have chosen a destination wedding, say in Hawaii, in which case a luau or a buffet may be more your type. This can be wonderful since the atmosphere is more relaxed and your guests would also feel more free to mingle at this kind of party than a more formal affair.

Of course, there's also western style. Instead of having someone cook up fancy dishes, why not ask your family and friends to participate in the ultimate American pot-luck?

The important things is for you to have fun as you start your married life together.

An inexpensive Dream Wedding

2006-04-18T07:35:00.000-07:00

Every girl wants a dream wedding. Unfortunately, dream weddings are really expensive!

There are ways to have an inexpensive dream wedding. For example:

Start by working on your guest list. The fewer the guests, the smaller the expense. Go for an intimate wedding with your family and closest friends only.

You can make your invitations yourself. There are a lot of computer software that can help you if you aren’t very skilled in the graphic arts.

Nowadays, brides can get married in almost any decent outfit, such as a suit or dress that you can use again.

Your entourage can also provide their own dresses; just give them the theme to follow.

Or rent your gowns. Some shops and online stores carry one time only clothes. Likewise the groom and groomsmen’s suits can rent their tuxedos or wedding suits.

Ask a friend who is skilled in make-up and hair styles to help out.

Ask your friends to bring their cameras and take pictures of your wedding for you.

Keeping it simple and from the heart is what will make it a dream wedding.

A Wedding Planner

2006-04-17T15:23:00.000-07:00

Your wedding is a major event, and wedding planning a major undertaking. That's why there are wedding planners!

A wedding planner, and some online helps, can offer you an overview of what needs to be done to prepare for your wedding. And checklists can give you a clearer idea of how to fit things into your timeline. Such a wedding checklist gives you an idea of what to prioritize, in addition to a list of tasks you need to accomplish.

Most wedding planners have a list of great places to check out in your area as far as where to hold the ceremony and the reception. Visit the websites and narrow down the ones that matches your budget and ideal.

Coordination once the Ceremony is over

2006-04-16T00:13:00.000-07:00

Your job as the wedding coordinator isn't over just because the wedding ceremony is.

Other things to attend to include:

Ensure toast, first dance, cake- cutting etc. are all orchestrated on time. Coordinate this with banquet staff.

Assist the bride and groom as necessary in getting their meal.

If there is not a cake-cutting ceremony, be sure bride and groom receive a piece of cake, and if they desire, save the top of the cake for them.

Instruct caterer on what to do with leftover food.

Assist the bride and groom as they exit the reception for their honeymoon.

Coordinating the Wedding Day

2006-04-15T09:00:00.000-07:00

For the person coordinating the Wedding Day, prepare for a long one. You need to be present a couple of hours prior to start of ceremony to greet and direct vendors as they arrive.

You'll need to assist the bride and bridal party as they get ready, as well as getting the bridal party and families to any pre-wedding photographic sessions on time.

Make sure they are in time for the arrival of the first guests for the ceremony. And you need to watch the time very carefully and monitor guest arrival flow of traffic to determine when to start ceremony. When this time arrives, get bridal party, families and everyone queued up and ready for processional.

Do the final check on boutonnieres, corsages, flower arrangements, ring on ring-bearer's pillow or with best man. Cue the music, start the processional, and monitor to ensure the bride's entrance is flawless.

After the ceremony, you escort the bridal party to a designated place to take photos.

Coordinating the Wedding Rehearsal

2006-04-14T09:12:00.000-07:00

A wedding coordinator's role concerning the Wedding Rehearsal includes:

Set the date, time and coordinate all participants for the rehearsal including bridal party, family, officiant, musicians, etc.

Orchestrate processional, recessional in order and to music desired.

Assign ushers, guest book attendant, who will place party favors and by what time on the wedding day, go over job descriptions with each key player, what time they are expected to be there, etc.

Assign bridal party the designated place and time of arrival, etc.

Pre-Rehearsal and Wedding

2006-04-13T10:05:00.000-07:00

If you choose not to hire a professional wedding coordinator, you must be preapred to have a friend or relative help orchestrate your wedding day. It is recommended that no member of the wedding party (including bride, groom, bridesmaids, groomsmen, parents or family of the bride or groom) take this on.

Prior to your Rehearsal and Wedding, you will need to:

Create and finalize master time line of all major wedding events and places: from rehearsal, ceremony, to cake cutting, first dance, toasting, arrival of vendors, etc.

Send master timeline to all vendors, within two weeks of your event: Be prepared to re-do and re-send as many times as necessary until everyone is in sync.

Make sure any and all specially requested touches or family traditions are integrated as requested by the bride throughout the pre-wedding process and wedding day.

Order of Events in the Recessional

2006-04-12T13:50:00.000-07:00

1. Bride and Groom exit

2. Flower Girl & Ring Bearer exit

3. Maid of Honor & Best Man exit

4. Bridesmaids (each accompanied by an usher) exit

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Alternative Exits for the Bride and Groom

2006-04-11T00:03:00.000-07:00

Leaving your wedding in a shower of rice is the traditional grand exit. However, many brides are creating other options. Alternatives to throwing rice include:

Toss birdseed.Pros: It’s organic and if the birds eat the free meal, no one has to clean up.

Toss colored confetti or paper streamers. Pretty and relatively cheap.

Blow bubbles. Gives an affect of childlike innocence and fun.

Release butterflies or doves. Very dramatic.

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Order of Events for a Wedding Reception

2006-04-10T00:00:00.000-07:00

First Hour:
Cocktail hour (waiters serve guests champagne and hors d’oeuvres)
Formal photograph’s taken (of Bride and Groom, family and wedding party)

Second Hour:
Announcement of wedding party
Traditional order: groom's parents, bride's parents, flower girl and ring bearer, bridesmaids escorted by ushers, maid of honor escorted by best man, Bride and Groom.
Bride and Groom's first dance
Champagne toast (marks the end of cocktail hour and cash bar begins)
Dinner served

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About Your Wedding Reception

2006-04-09T00:03:00.000-07:00

At the bride and groom's table, where does the bride sit?
The bride is seated on the groom's right.

Who reads the congratulatory telegrams aloud?
The best man reads any congratulatory telegrams.

Is the groom obligated to dance with someone besides his bride?
Yes, he is obligated to dance with his mother, mother-in-law, and the maid of honor.

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Tips For Making a Wedding Toast

2006-04-08T00:22:00.000-07:00

Think about what you are going to say. Many brides have said they regretted the impromptu speeches of their loved ones because they didn’t say anything meaningful.

Use a microphone if necessary. There is nothing worse than loosing the audience’s attention because they can’t hear what you have to say.

Be brief. Limit your speech to 3 or 4 minutes.

Don’t isolate parts of your audience. If only 15 out of 100 people understand the inside joke, then don’t tell it. Likewise, if you a mention a person that many people don’t know, use a label to clarify their relationship to you such as, "Maria, my cousin".

Back characteristics up by using an example. For instance, "This couple is so adventurous. Did you know that on their first date they went bungee jumping?" This keeps the audience’s interest, but also makes the speech more memorable.

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The Wedding Toast

2006-04-07T09:28:00.000-07:00

Asuggested order for toasting during the Rehearsal Dinner is:

The best man toasts the bride

The bride toasts the groom

The groom toasts the bride's mother

The bride's father toasts the groom's parents.

Tips About Giving The Toast:

Keep the toast 3-5 minutes long and maintain eye contact with the bride and groom as you deliver it.

Stand and deliver! Sit down if it's for you. If you're giving the toast, you should stand up.

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Best Man’s Speech

2006-04-06T00:45:00.000-07:00

Deciding whether to crack everyone up or keep it safe and serious is one of the dilemmas many Best Men face when it comes to the “Best Man’s Speech”. Since developing a speech can be a challenging responsibility, we include some examples of speeches that are sure to make the moment memorable and even touching.

Here are some basic tips to keep in mind:

Identify yourself and your relationship with the bride and groom (not everyone will know who you are).

Speak slowly, clearly and loud enough for everyone to hear.

Thank the parents of the bride and groom if they paid for the event. If the bride and groom are footing the bill themselves, thank them for inviting everyone to share the big day.

Tell a story or use an inspirational quote.

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How NOT to Faint at the Altar

2006-04-05T16:13:00.000-07:00

Many brides and some grooms fear that they will faint once they are at the altar. Here are a few tips to keep in mind, just in case you feel you are going to "keel" over!

The day of the wedding, avoid eating heavy meals but rather try eating lightly throughout the day. Do make sure you eat though.

Eat chicken or fish, cold salads, cheese and crackers, toast, scrambled eggs, bagels, and lightly seasoned pasta dishes (avoiding spicy tomato sauces and try for pasta in light olive oil

Avoid gas-producing foods such as beans, cauliflower and broccoli.

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San Diego Wedding Tips, hosted by Brookside

2006-04-05T11:34:00.000-07:00

Brookside Farm, just east of San Diego on the 94, offers you a lovely, park-like setting for your San Diego wedding, reception or event, comfortably handling up to 150 guests.

Our open air San Diego wedding and reception location is available April through October and offers a series of romantic, shaded terraces towered over by billowing oaks and a formidable natural rock formation. So you can host your reception outdoors on tiered terraces under an enormous native Californian oak tree, and dance surrounded by twinkling lights! —Whatever your wedding or reception theme, Brookside provides a private, exclusive and magical setting that will create memories you will cherish for years to come.

We have a well qualified staff who will be more than happy to recommend experienced professionals who will assist you with all the coordination details of your big day to make your dream of a perfect wedding and reception come true.